"Little Becomes Much"

"My God uses plain ole ordinary people.

He chooses people just like me and you,

who are willing to do everything that He commands.

God uses people that will give Him all.

It doesn't matter - it doesn't matter how small

your all may seem to you.  Because little becomes 

much as you place it in the Master's hand..."

This time last year, I was unable to do much of a post.  After losing my mother just a few months earlier, I could barely breathe, much less string together a thought into a cohesive sentence.  This year, I'd like to say that I am in a much better place.  However, as you can see, it's been quite some time since I've posted.  With that said, I must apologize not only to you all, but to God the Father/Mother.  I must apologize to my ancestors, Creation and the Universe for forgetting who I am, whose I am and what I've been called to do.  I have fallen down on my duties and my purpose as if I thought I would somehow be exempt from the reality of death and dying - from the reality of losing family, parents, friends and colleagues.  So please forgive me. 

Recently, I met a new acquaintance through a mutual friend.  During some light conversation on an occasion of breaking bread, we were all sharing how we belonged to the "Motherless/Fatherless" crew and how difficult Christmas and the New Year is for us all - and at the time, especially me.  She, having lost her mother and father as well, shared with us something her mother has spoken to her as her life ebbed away; "Everybody wants to see Jesus, but nobody wants to die."  Her response, although rather flip hit me like a glass of cold water.  The truth of the matter is that she's right.  We pray for and sing about "Going Up Yonder," and how we're gonna "Walk Around Heaven All Day," and yet, when death finds our door, we weep and wail for the loss instead of celebrating, really celebrating the fact that our faith tells us that our loved ones are going to a much better place.  Daily, we give little to no thought that God emptied out the God Spirit that manifested in human form for the singular purpose to die so that others might have life-eternal.  And, that that manifested human came into this earthly realm not as one born into a family of great wealth, power or privilege, but as a peasant, bastard child - one of questionable birth - born of a single woman, and cared for by a simple man - just ordinary people.

This post, therefore, is a re-dedication of sorts.  I must take pause and recommit myself to giving God what it is God has called for me to give.  I take this time to recommit myself to giving my all to God, to all that I have been "purposed" for in the first place.  I had begun to feel that I had failed miserably, that I had wasted a lifetime away because I had not acquired, nor could I present all of the accouterments of a "successful" or "Great" life.  And then I remembered myself and all of my heroes - women and men - who have inspired me to be "Great" and to do "Great" things.  They are men and women who endured incredible hardships, betrayal, loneliness, beatings, threats against their life and yes, many gave their life - certainly no small matter - for something as small as the right to vote.  If, asked by a contemporary, "What have you done with all that you have?"  Many of those women and men would probably have responded in the way that I did.  And yet, because of their "small" deeds, we now live in a world where we haphazardly go about with little to no thought about how "Great" those "small" deeds have become for us individually and collectively.

And so, Lord, forgive me for my moment in the pity-pot, for lamenting my lack of "Greatness."  As Martin Luther King, Jr. instructed in his sermon, "The Drum Major Instinct," I, too, fell victim to the desire to be "important," a desire for "attention," the desire "to achieve distinction, to lead the parade."  Lord, I had forgotten how "small" you chose to become, the "small" simple life you chose to live, the "small" simple lies, taunts and betrayals you chose to suffer, and finally, the "small" simple act of laying down your human life so that others might live.  I had forgotten who I was and whose I was until another dear friend sang the song, "Just Ordinary People," by Danniebelle Hall.  It was a song she felt - through her observations - best described me and my faith walk.  She brought me to tears because I had forgotten and lost myself within myself.  I had forgotten how "Great" the "small" act of maintaining a sense of "moral excellence," and how important a larger commitment to "love" is. I had forgotten the "new norm of Greatness."  That being, "everybody can be 'Great,' because everybody can serve."  And so, Lord, I recommit myself to live a life of service - to live a life of purpose that may not come with the material things of life.  I recommit myself to live the life I sing about.

Lord I beg your pardon...  I'm back.

"If I can help somebody as I pass along.
If I can cheer somebody with a word or song.
If I can show somebody he's traveling wrong, 
then my living will not be in vain." 
© Dorinda G. Henry, 2013

THEOLOGIA HABITUS EST!